The most successful single moms have a support system to assist help her with managing day to day. So you’re a single mom. That doesn’t mean you have to raise your kids alone. A support system can help you get things done and assist in making life easier.
There are different roles you need to fill on your support system to make it beneficial for you. Now if you don’t have all of these people in place that’s okay. But start with the one that is most needed for your situation at this time and then go from there. Build your team as you go on a as needed basis.
The 6 essential people you need in your support system:
Encourager – This is the person that will keep you going. They will encourage you to push past your limitations and make it happen. Your encourager is usually the person that has no idea exactly what you are going through or how it is really affecting you, but will still be supportive and give you a listening ear. They will always give you sincere, positive feedback and always has an inspirational word. You absolutely MUST have an encourager in your support system! There will be those times when you’re just not feeling confident or cheerful. Your encourager will come through with a word that will make your day.
Expert – It is vital to have an expert in your life. Someone who has been there and done that successfully. This person can give you experiences, advice, and instruction on motherhood and beyond. It’s amazing to save yourself the headache of trial and error. For example, I like to have a wife with multiple children as my expert. This way I know she has experience with managing a household with children and a spouse. When I get married I will already have insight to marriage and my chances of being more successful sooner will increase. Experience is the best teacher, so why not learn from someone that has a proven successful track record.
Expediter – This is someone that can give you information and resources quickly. When you may not have time to research your question and you just need an answer quickly, an expeditor can help. Do you need directions to a new place? Maybe you need a childcare or pediatrician referral. The expeditor is the person you need to help you accelerate the process. This person can be key when things are hectic and you can’t be bothered with research.
Emergency Contact – Listen up. You CANNOT be a successful single mom without this person. OK, that’s kinda dramatic but, you need to have an emergency contact person. This is someone you can call if your car breaks down on the side of the road and you need someone to come and pick you up. This person will pick your kids up from daycare when you have to work late and keep your sick child when she can’t go to school, but you still have to go to work. This is the person that will come through for you with little or no advance notice. If you do nothing else, get an emergency contact.
Equal – Now this is me! The single mom you know that understands what you are going through (smile) and supports you through the process. You absolutely MUST have another single mom on your team. Often times people don’t understand the true challenges that a single mom can face. Having an equal or someone that’s in the same situation can be a relief. This is the person you can vent to and she will actually be able to give feedback from a place of understanding. Also, this will be your parenting ally. You can help each other along the way and both benefit from the friendship. On nights when you don’t feel like making dinner, she can bring some of what she prepared for you and the kids. You can alternate babysitting each others kids for the other to go out and get some adult time. There are a number of ways you can help one another. Please, get another single mom in your support system.
Enthusiast – Now this is the life the party. This is the person that will help you let go and have fun every now and then. The enthusiast will encourage you to stop stressing and live. She is usually the one who always has something funny to say and keeps you laughing. She’s carefree and loves to have fun. You probably have to wonder if she’s serious half of the time because she’s always joking or seriously nonchalant. This is the person that will keep you sane.
Now, I understand having all of these people in place may not be possible for some. Don’t be afraid to add your favorite blogger, podcaster, life coach or motivational speaker to your team. You can have an online encourager that may inspire you better than anyone available to you in your life at the moment. I love to listen to podcast, and periscope is my jam. I can always find inspiration from all the amazing people I follow.
All in all, having a strong support system can be the key to your success as a single mom. You can manage your life effectively and be more productive with the help of others who want to see you win.
Hey, why not add me to your system? Im a pretty awesome encourager. Sign up to receive my free newsletter to receive your weekly encouragement from me.
Do you have a support system? What person is the most important for your life right now?
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